Saturn and Mars

Why do you make everything about you

I mean EVERYTHING

God... I could beat you to a pulp... the amount of anger I have... just please... stop...

I could be having the time of my life, and somehow you would figure out a way to turn that into me hating you even more. If I'm ever happy and it's not because of you, it eats at you doesn't it. You're like a plague. No, plagues eat relentlessly, while you just pick my most happiest moments to do it, dont you. I think thats worse.

Why dont you leave them alone. Leave them all alone. Its because of you I hate myself. Because I see in you what I once wanted to be. It's not even your fault. It's just because you're so, hateable. So stupid, and airheaded, and ignorant. And I try so hard not to see those things in you. I even tried to love you for a point. There was no point in that was there. I slowly came to realize that you dont live for love. You dont even want it. You consume love. It fuels you, doesnt it. You horde it. For power. For protection. As a gauge of your self worth.

How do I know all this, you ask? Because I do it too. I try, though perhaps not so brazenly. Perhaps more subtle. Perhaps not. But I horde love as well. I dont cherish it the way I should. But I know the error in it. Perhaps I haven't corrected it yet, but it is still a problem for me. For you it is not. I dont think it ever will. You are too stubborn in your ways to realize how wrong you are. But perhaps I am the greater of two evils if I realize its wrong and continue on anyways. And whats worse, I string along people, oblivious to it all of what I do.

So I am the evil in the end. And it is in this statement I realize, I have turned my rage towards you, from your hurt on others, into the rage against me, and the ten-fold worse evils I have unleashed upon others. We are so alike, you and I. Do you even realize it. Should one of us die... I think I'd be a lot more assured of the future of this fragile planet. Should both of us die... I think everyone else would be too.

~Anonymous